Happy Day, Reader.
In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I want to talk about traditions. In particular, I want to talk about my ideal holiday traditions.
I think it’s nice to get in the holiday spirit, and I think it’s mentally beneficial to participate in holiday traditions. Otherwise, what separates the passing of time? Getting involved in the seasons helps to differentiate one day from the other. It gives a person something to look forward to.
Celebrations are also a great time to bring together your community, be it your literal community, friends, or family.
The key there, in the “looking forward” concept, is to not participate in traditions that you don’t like. With that in mind, I have taken bits and pieces from my childhood, my adult life, and internet inspiration to create my ideal traditions for each holiday. These are, of course, flexible and open to improvement, but this is what I’m working with now.
Normally I would start at the top, but let’s start with the seasonally appropriate.
Thanksgiving
I think I would prefer to host Thanksgiving than to go somewhere else, with the caveat that hosting does not equate to catering. In my opinion, Thanksgiving is a day for relaxing, day-drinking, over-indulging on delicious food, not exhausting myself out in the kitchen.
I am ALL for ordering some smoked turkey or ham, buying some premade sides/desserts at a bulk store or local bakery, and heating it up the day of. I think anyone invited with a preference for their home cooked dish is more than welcome to bring it. And whoever doesn’t partake in the food preparations helps with the clean up.
I can’t explain why, but if I had a big property and some sort of side-by-side, it also feels like the correct day to pile in some random friends and family members, and go for a drive around the lot. I’m also a big fan of the post-meal digestion walk and the post-walk nap.
Black Friday
In my dream world, me and my future spouse would both have the Friday after Thanksgiving off from work. We’d wake up, make breakfast, drink mimosas, put up the Christmas tree, and decorate for the holiday season. The TV would play a marathon of Netflix/Hallmark Christmas movies in the background. We’d eat leftovers and share our Christmas wish lists, and then maybe do some individual online shopping on the couch.
Christmas Eve
I love a good Christmas Eve party. I suppose everyone has a different idea of “party” but I mean some people I like, some casual but yummy refreshments, and some hanging out. Maybe some sort of silly gift exchange. I know “Eve” implies evening, but I would be fine with this being an afternoon sort of thing.
A couple years ago there was an Indiana Jones marathon running on Christmas Eve, and for whatever reason, I want that to be a repeated thing in my life. I want to spend the evening sipping something warm and delicious (mulled cider!!), and watching Indiana Jones.
Christmas Day
My ideal Christmas Day: Me and my partner wake up, make coffee, exchange gifts, make breakfast, and have a lazy morning. Come lunch, we pack up any gifts or food and head over to a family celebration. After the celebration, we return home and take a nap. Then, come dinnertime, we head out to a local Chinese restaurant. We indulge and go back home, make some mulled wine, and pick a Harry Potter movie or three to watch.
A note on the “gifts for family”- never again will I partner myself up with someone who is incapable of gift giving. We will be doing that as a team. We will collaborate on the recipient list, we will both engage in the strategic sniffing out of wants/needs of our loved ones, we will shop for the perfect gifts together, and we will both be competent gift wrappers.
There is literally no excuse for less than that, if your partner is an average functioning adult who is capable of holding interpersonal relationships and accessing the internet. This has been a PSA. Thank you.
New Year’s Eve
I have no strong feelings about New Year’s Eve. I’d be open to hosting a party or going to a party, but I would also be open to staying at home and watching the ball drop on TV. The past few years, I’ve simply slept through it. Which is fine, I guess, but it’s kind of boring and missing an opportunity to have a little more fun. I suppose I would prefer doing SOMETHING, but the “something” is flexible.
New Year’s Day
A good day to tidy up. Put away gifts, put away decorations, deep clean up the holiday cheer. And then order takeout and relax.
Valentine’s Day
This is such a scam of a holiday and you can’t convince me otherwise. I know it’s a scam because I’ve worked on the industry side, so I can confirm 100% you are being scammed.
THAT SAID, I still like when partners do something a little special on this day. I get it, you show your love all the time, but show it this time, too. I do think that should go both ways, genders irrelevant.
I’m personally not a red rose, big teddy bear, jewelry, and overpriced dinner reservation kind of girl. (Cheap, heart-shaped box of assorted chocolates, though? Delicious.) I also do not love any sort of situation that comes with sex expectations because, quite frankly, I hate to be told what to do, particularly by societal expectations.
I would be happy with some Trader Joe’s country roses in any pastel color, a cute card, and a little gift (aforementioned chocolates? A new book?). I would also get my partner a little treat to their personal taste (like a bottle of one of their favorite wines, a package of their favorite snack, a book/record, etc.)
And then, maybe, say, if I worked early mornings, my partner got up early while I showered and made us both breakfast or packed me a lunch. And say they normally cooked dinner, so I picked up our favorite takeout on the way home. That sort of thing. Something that says this is a silly holiday but I see you and I appreciate you so let me show you.
I’d prefer we each have a budget (like maybe no more than $25-50) so it’s more like creative and special little things, and not some elaborate display of affection.
Fat Tuesday
Listen. Paczki.
I am not religious and never plan to be, but I will happily partake in the eating of paczki. Something to look forward to during the dreaded late winter months.
Easter
See former holiday: not religious. Thus, Easter doesn’t really matter to me. I would actually love to someday, perhaps with a future significant other, make up an Easter tradition. I can tell you for certain, though, it will be more of a “doing this while others celebrate Easter” and not *celebrating Easter*.
Independence Day
I like the visuals of fireworks but I don’t like the environmental impact. I think rather than disrupting the hell out of wildlife, I’d like to make a future tradition of having a big BBQ. Or better yet, a boil. Omg, Reader, wait, I’m suddenly so excited.
I once went to a party that I still think about. There were lots of picnic tables and they dumped a big pot of crawfish boil on each one. There were canoes full of ice with cocktails in mason jars, white wine, and beers. There was a table for bottles of red and some different sangrias in those clear glass drink dispensers. There was one long table set up with sides, and one with desserts.
Imagine: a warm summer night, somebody’s back yard with a heated pool, lawn games, a bonfire, sparklers, and everything mentioned above.
Halloween
Leading up to Halloween, I like to read spooky books for the vibes. As for the day itself, I don’t have any particular pull towards a tradition. I could be open to a haunted maze or hayride, or passing out candy, or dressing up for a Halloween party. I would also be open to watching some movies, eating some snacks, and going to bed. I guess it depends on the day and the weather.
Potential
I would love to go to Beltane, Midsummer, and Yule celebrations. Perhaps I would then integrate those into my personal traditions.
🦃
There you have it, Reader. My take on traditions. I think the most important takeaway here is that you should celebrate in ways that make you excited and comfortable. Don’t feel obligated to do something because it’s the way it’s always been done, or because you feel like you’re supposed to. Set boundaries so you can enjoy this time. It’s nice to have things to look forward to in this life, and it’s great to have excuses to spend time with loved ones. Let’s make some memories and have some fun.